Thursday, October 23, 2014

A Fly on the Wall in Mrs. Poinker's Classroom.

Fly on the Wall



8:30: Mrs. Poinker: Good morning 4B!

8:30.5 Class: Good mombing Ms. Porner.

8:30.7 Mrs Poinker: That was terrible. Let’s try it again! Good morning 4B!

8:30.9 Class: (Really vocal with out of time echoing) GOOD MOMBING MS POMBER! OMBER! BER!

8:30.12 Mrs. Poinker: That was awfu…. Never mind.

8:30. 14 Mrs. Poinker: Open up your maths books for a times table test please and number the page from one to thirty. Darius, can you go back to your seat? Portia please don’t swing on your chair. Prospero! Put those elastic bands in your pencil case! Beezelebub! Do not throw your sharpener at Mercutio!

Beezlebub: But he threw his rubber at me first Mrs. Poinker.

Mrs. Poinker: Okay, both your names are going on the whiteboard as a warning. One more thing and you miss out on play at first break.

Mercutio: That sucks!

Mrs. Poinker: Okay Mercutio, you’re calling out so that’s no play at first break.

Beezlebub laughs.

Mrs. Poinker: That’s you too, Beezlebub.

Beezlebub hangs his head and swears under his breath.

Portia: (The Terry O'Gorman in the classroom)

That’s a bit harsh!

Mrs. Poinker: Well now you can join them at first break too Portia.


Silence.



9:00 The class is working in their Maths books.

Mrs. Poinker notices Darius drawing monster trucks on a scrap of paper.

Mrs. Poinker: Darius! What are you doing?

Darius: (stares vacantly at the teacher then whispers) 
Drawing.

Mrs. Poinker: What should you be doing?

Darius: (languidly gazing over at what the boy beside him is doing) My maths?

Mrs. Poinker: Why aren’t you doing it, Darius?

Darius: Because I’m drawing?

Mrs. Poinker: (through gritted teeth) Do. Your. Maths. Darius.

9:30 Mrs. Poinker: Okay everyone, pass your books to the end of the table.

Darius joyfully throws his book across the room narrowly missing Cressida’s chin.

Mrs. Poinker: Right Darius! That’s enough! Go to the office.

Darius grins at the class and waves goodbye as he meanders out the door enjoying the attention.

Mrs. Poinker: We have rules in this classroom!

11:00: (after first break)

Mrs. Poinker: (noticing Darius back in the classroom chatting merrily to his neighbour walks over discreetly):

What happened in the office Darius? Who did you talk to? (Thinking Principal? Deputy Principal? Assistant to the Principal?)

Darius gawps vacuously: No-one, Mrs. Poinker.

Mrs. Poinker: What do you mean no-one, Darius? Who did you talk to?

Darius (innocently muttering) : You just told me to go to the office Mrs. Poinker, you didn’t tell me to talk to anyone.

Mrs. Poinker: So you just went and sat in the office?

Darius: Yes.


It’s still only eleven o’clock and Mrs. Poinker wishes she had a hip flask already.


Thanks to my blogging friend Marcia from Menopausal Mother for the inspiration!