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Tuesday, August 4, 2015

Things That Fudging Annoy Me!

    


1. When the doona ends up scrunched up on Scotto’s side and I have nothing except a shred of flimsy cotton to protect me from the arctic blast from the air conditioner.

2. The fact we still have to have the fudging air conditioner on even though it’s winter because the Chihuahua wakes up at every beat of a moth’s wing and goes off barking and growling like a hound of the Baskervilles so we have to have the windows shut at night.

3. When Scotto shakes out the doona to give me more insulation at the same time I have a coffee in my hand and am balancing a laptop on my knees and I spill my wine, I mean my coffee all over me.

4. When Scotto starts swearing at the dogs because they won’t settle because he just unceremoniously shook them out of the doona.

5. The clicking sound of the remote that accompanies Scotto's cantankerous swearing when the Internet is broken and he’s trying to get stupid fudging Netflix to work through his laptop.

6. The dogs trembling beside me like nervous, sycophantic neurotics because they get scared when Scotto swears.

7. When I have to get up and go to the toilet just before I’m ready to go to sleep, after the dogs have eventually slunk under the covers and I've finally organised the doona to accommodate my shivering, skeletal frame.

8. When, after I’ve been to the loo, my nineteen year old daughter knocks on the door looking for toothpaste.

9. When after I’ve found the toothpaste for her I need to go to the toilet again.

10. When I get back to bed and the Chihuahua decides that because I got up, he has to get up and he won’t go back to bed and sniffs around the doona making Scotto swear again.

11. When Scotto snaps his laptop shut in an angry manner and swears again because Netflix still won’t work and I tell him to calm down and then he says he wishes a solar flare would hit the earth and wipe out all technology so we wouldn’t have to worry about it and I say innocently that he should just ‘turn the telly off’ and then he gets all huffy.






Anything annoying you lately?