Pinky's Book Link

Monday, August 17, 2015

My Homework from ProBlogger

I arrived home from the ProBlogger event, held at the fabulous Royal Pines Resort on the Gold Coast last night and now I have to write an eBook. Or is it an Ebook? Or an EBOOK? Or an ebOOk? 

I’m not sure which, but anyway... I have to write one.

According to the highly professional speakers we had the pleasure of listening to on the weekend, the best bloggers give back to their reading community. But in the last two and a half years I’ve given you all nothing but a headache and a niggling suspicion there’s something extremely wrong with me. I need to lift my game.

I did think about it at length and I sort of decided I could probably write about “The Disgraceful Habits of Appalling Old Women” considering my reputed behaviour. I could write an electronic book about how to be a disgusting old bat with a side dressing of style.

I was sitting in the teacher's staff room today, regaling my friends with stories about how I was running around with a certain breed of blogging buddies at the ProBlogger function on Friday night and what delirious fun I’d had drinking champagne and ripping off my mouth filter.

 Over my punitive tuna and spinach salad (after a weekend of pina colada-flavoured, macaroon decadence), I told the girls how I left my husband chatting to a decidedly attractive blogger (who looked exactly like Olivia Newton John, actually) and on the way back from the toilet I decided to make an impromptu visit to a bar at the resort with the gals without telling him and how he then lost me for an hour and a half despite calling me eighteen times on my mobile until he eventually grew suspicious and wandered into the bar where I was having a freaking whale of a time 'networking' and proceeded to greet him with a highly animated Mexican Wave (for one) and then he was very cranky and started to speak to me in a raised voice and I told him it was all the fault of my blogging buddies and that they’d led me astray and I was just an innocent acolyte who’d been abducted and besides, the last time I’d seen him, he was talking to Olivia Newton John, so I was the one who should be angry, not him, and would he like to buy me a drink now that he was here. He bucked up about it for a few minutes insisting I’d set him up with Olivia as a subterfuge but after a while he forgot about it and went and bought himself a beer.

I noticed Kaz and Kyles giving each other secretive looks at the staff room table as they listened to my waffling.

“So… Scotto was angry at your blogging pals, not you?” Kyles gave me the stink eye.

“Yes!” I beamed. “Only for a bit, though.”

“So he was angry with them the same way he gets angry with us when we ‘lead you astray’?” Kaz said in a sour voice. I didn’t like the way she used air quotes when she said ‘lead you astray’.

“Do you think maybe it could be you leading others astray, Pinky?” Kyles tapped her fork against her Tupperware container of ‘tuna something’.

I thought about it for a few seconds and realised it was a preposterous notion. Here I am, a dear little old lady, nearly FIFTY-FIVE years old for gawd’s sake. These young girls come along and force champagne down my neck… what am I supposed to do? Say no?

But even though I don’t think I did anything wrong, I don’t suppose Appalling Old Women will be my Eee Book after all.

I think it will be,

Twenty Best Chihuahua Recipes

Chihuahua Schnitzel! Yum!

Me and Kathy from 50 Shades of Age

KatKerryn and Pinky

Me and the star of Aussie blogging... Mrs Woog!

It honestly was an even better conference than 2014.
Congratulations to everyone who was involved in the planning. Can't wait for next year!

Linking up with Essentially Jess for #IBOT