I’ve given up my personal Facebook page for Lent after the disgraceful post I accidentally put on my dear friend, Alana’s Facebook feed.
It was the least I could do. I just don’t trust FB anymore.
Facebook is the new Satan.
Anyway, yesterday, when I was at the new and lovely Catholic school I work at, waiting for my class to line up, one of the teachers squirreled over to me and furtively informed me that I should most definitely consider purchasing a ‘Cock Collar’.
I choked back the scream.
“Don’t Google it,” she warned. “But apparently a Chinese woman in Brisbane sells them.”
Naturally, I was super pumped to get home and inform Scotto that we needed to buy a Cock Collar.
Disappointingly, he was nonplussed.
“Yeah, Pinky,” he drawled. “Someone already mentioned that to me today, too.”
“Don’t Google it,” she warned. “But apparently a Chinese woman in Brisbane sells them.”
Naturally, I was super pumped to get home and inform Scotto that we needed to buy a Cock Collar.
Disappointingly, he was nonplussed.
“Yeah, Pinky,” he drawled. “Someone already mentioned that to me today, too.”
It seems EVERYONE here knows about Cock Collars.
So now I have to source a Cock Collar without Googling it.
I can just picture me wandering in to Target and asking the pimply faced attendant if they have any Cock Collars.
Why is life so fudging hard?
P.S. We need a cock collar for our spiteful and detestable Pekin rooster who has begun crowing (as well as kick-boxing the hens in the fanny at every opportunity) and the only people who are willing to adopt him want to kill him and eat him.
Do you know where I can buy a Cock Collar?
So now I have to source a Cock Collar without Googling it.
I can just picture me wandering in to Target and asking the pimply faced attendant if they have any Cock Collars.
Why is life so fudging hard?
P.S. We need a cock collar for our spiteful and detestable Pekin rooster who has begun crowing (as well as kick-boxing the hens in the fanny at every opportunity) and the only people who are willing to adopt him want to kill him and eat him.
Do you know where I can buy a Cock Collar?
P.P.S. I'm still trying out the title generator on Google.