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Thursday, January 24, 2013

"Hop on Top of Pop" by Dr Suss.

Long distance relationships can be difficult.

During the months apart before Scotto transferred to Townsville, we pledged to each other that we would write an email every single night without fail. 
Keeping this promise was often a very arduous challenge.

Firstly, it was frequently difficult to come up with something even vaguely interesting to say night after night. There are only so many ways to say things like,

“Picked the kids up from school today and they had a fight all the way home in the car. Lulu has head lice again and Thaddeus has done something funny to the computer so that when Jonah types his name in, it comes up as ‘dickhead’ and I don’t know how to fix it.”

My days just weren’t very exciting.

Secondly, access to the one ineffectual, dial-up computer in the house was a rigorously defended commodity; with Herr Jonah and Herr Thaddeus acting as if they were the Gestapo guarding the barbed wire fence at Auschwitz. 

My strategy for surmounting the second problem was scrupulous attention to timing. At about six-thirty each evening I would shout out that dinner was on the table. That presented me with about fifteen precious minutes to sprint upstairs, log on, and hastily type out an email with one finger before the wails of protest began.

The only way to shake things up in regards to the first problem was to be inventive. After one of Scotto’s weekend visits, when the kids had been staying at their father’s ( nudge, nudge, wink, wink), I looked to Dr. Seuss for inspiration.

By replacing nouns with Dr. Seuss words I realized what a truly filthy man Dr. Seuss actually was.

(Please be aware that this is NOT a love letter or a reflection on the weekend. It was only a joke!)

Hello my Chief Yookeroo! (I wrote)

I just wanted to let you know how much I enjoyed working on your Palooski on the weekend, and I just loved the way you worked on my Hinkle-Horn Honkers. 

You are such an energetic Long-Legged Kwong and I just adore your Flummox so much…especially your Itch-a-pods… mmmmm!

I know we were worried we wouldn’t be able to Jibboo, but it was great that we managed it, and that Gertrude McFuzz got her act together. 
I must say, my Floob-Boober-Bab-Boober-Buds are a bit sore but probably not as sore as your Zlock! 

Anyway my adorable cute little Drum Tummied Snumm, your precious Plain-Belly Snetch has to do some real work.

Love and kisses, Foona Lagoona Baboona.

P.S. I hope your Nooth Grush is not stinging too much!

We went for a picnic and bush-walking okay!!!!!

Reposted and linked up to Weekend Rewind with Sonia from Life Love and Hiccups!