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| Pinky and her Cyber Buddies! |
I suppose now I have a twenty-five year old son I should probs think about growing up. You know, by avoiding the use of abbreviations like 'probs' instead of saying 'probably'.
Or saying things are 'Hilaire' instead of hilarious.
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| Hilaire! |
I spotted this at Dan Murphy's liquor outlet the other day and just like a teenager felt compelled to Instagram it, then tweet it to my 'blogging bestie', Lee-Anne.
As I said... I should, like totally grow up.
As Thaddeus was trapped on my couch awaiting his celebratory feast I thought it might be a good time to force him to read a couple of my posts. I particularly wanted him to read the post I wrote titled, Muslims and Me which I thought he might like.
I watched him like a hawk as he scanned it. "Yes," he nodded. "Very quaint, mother."
"Quaint?" I shrilled. "I don't think quaint is the correct word, Thaddeus. Don't you mean poignant?"
"Okay, it was very poignant then," he agreed, looking at his watch then squinting towards the kitchen with a ravenous look on his face.
"Anyway, who are all these people commenting on your blog mother?" he asked in a mocking tone. "Do you know any of them?"
"Yes. I do, Thaddeus," I replied defensively. "They're my friends!"
"But you can't call them friends, Mother! Who's Jo Wake then?" he challenged.
"Jo is a lovely English lady who lives in Canada and writes about cooking and ten pin bowling and is married to Matt so there!" I replied.
"Kez?" he continued.
"Kez is a real sweetie who has a toddler son and writes inspirational posts. See! I do know them all!"
"And what about Liz?"
"Liz is a substitute teacher living in southern California who enjoys knitting," I recited.
"Linda?" he tested.
"I adore Linda! She lives on the Gold Coast but is originally from South Africa. She has older kids and hot flushes just like me!"
"Deb?" he sniffed.
"Deb lives in Hervey Bay and writes about lots of stuff, like book reviews and weight issues. She's awesome."
"Who's this Louise Allen?"
"Thaddeus! I'll have you know Louise is a General Practitioner, author and is far too smart to be reading Pinky Poinker's rubbish and even though she does live in Tasmania I don't hold that against her."
"Okay..." he paused, "Lee-Anne? Who's sh... Oh! I know Lee-Anne! She's that hot chick we had drinks with in Sydney and I ate all her dip and cheese.
Kathy? Who's Kathy when she's at home then?"
"Kathy," I replied with a self satisfied grin, "Is a lady of my vintage who has spent the last six months doing a road trip around Australia and owns a Labrador and a really nice camera."
"Rae?" he sighed.
"Rae is from Perth. I've met her and love her even though she tried to pick up Scotto in the bar at Pro Blogger, so there!"
"I bet you don't know this Yin Yang Mother my dear mother!"
"Oh yes I do Thaddeus Smarmy! I've met her too! She is an ex television journalist, has two adorable children and I'm going to be using her excellent meditation videos with my students!"
"Tell me about Denise!" he dared.
"I met Denise at ProBlogger too Thaddeus. Stunning Irish lass who writes about blogging and writing and things."
"I suppose you met Mummy Wife Me there too?"
"I did actually," I replied triumphantly. "And her name's Renee!"
"Middle Aged Mama too?"
"Yep. That's my friend from Brisbane, Janet."
"Alana Maree?"
"I haven't met her yet but we've plotted to get together for a knees up at some stage..." I smirked. "You should read her blog Thaddeus. She's pretty dope."
"Why are you saying 'dope' Mother? Don't you think you're a bit old to be using that jargon?"
"I can see you changing the subject because you're losing the argument Thaddeus," I scowled.
"Can I also add that I also regularly communicate with the hilaire Hugzy from Melbourne, Lydia who writes very thoughtful posts about all sorts of things, Kat who lives in Cairns and is married to a professional soccer player, Rebecca who writes about being a mum AND a plumber, Emily who's a funny New Zealander, Queenslander hybrid, Lisa who is very zen, Ness from Sydney, Brenda from Coogee, who's an excessively amusing and clever nut case, Alison my Scottish freind who used to blog but gave it up to do psychology and Louisa who writes about middle age and her annoying children... children just like you, Thaddeus."
He gave up after that.
But there were two amazing revelations I gained from our debate.
Firstly,
I really have met some wonderful people since I began this blogging journey. I'd like to thank you all for being so supportive and I hope I give back to you as well.
Secondly,
The longer you leave a roast pork in the oven the crunchier the crackling.
Who did I stupidly forget? Slap me now!
