Please feel free to add any questions you have in the comments.
How long is a piece of string?
Double half its length. [1]
Why do dogs look like their owners?
This is a fallacy and it never happens. [2]
What came first, the chicken or the egg?
Neither, it was the kid on the box of cornflakes holding the box with the photo of himself holding a box with a photo of himself holding a box with a photo of himself…. [3]
Why does the moon look so big in the sky sometimes?
It’s an optical illusion. When it’s close to the horizon you’re probably on your third of the evening's Chardy/Sav Blanc and it just appears to look bigger. [4]
Why does the weekend go so fast?
Seriously? The working week goes for five days and the weekend goes for only two. Five take away two is … hang on… seven take away two is… it‘s just not as long okay! [5]
Why is it so hard to lose weight?
Basically, it’s because food and wine are so bloody lovely. [6]
Why won’t my eyebrows grow back?
They’re afraid after what you did to them back in the late seventies. [7]
Why can’t I make a bowel movement?
Cheese on biscuits. [8]
Why is the sky blue?
Because it recently lost its job, had a baby and was disappointed when Breaking Bad finished. [9]
Why is my poop green?
Too many green cocktails at the St Paddy’s Day party. [10]
Why am I always tired?
Life. [11]
Why is my dog throwing up?
It ate four pig’s ears; its own and three belonging to the other dogs. [12]
How can I make my hair grow faster?
Go on school camp where you can’t shave your legs. [13]
Why do I always see the same time on the clock when I wake up in the middle of the night?
Your clock is broken. [14]
What is the smallest unit of life?
A mouse. Or maybe a flea [15]
Who is the most powerful Jedi?
Mr Spock because he was extremely logical. [16]
Why isn’t my wife talking to me?
Because she is busy writing rubbish on her blog and you should never disturb a genius. [17]
When is Pinky going to stop writing this utter garbage?
Now. [18]
Notes: [1] O’Reilly “Musings of a Male Primary Teacher” [2] Pinky Poinker “Living in Denial” [3] Pinky Poinker “Who’s Old Enough to Remember This?” [4] Pinky Poinker “A Brief History of Moon Facts”[5] Pinky Poinker “The Time Traveller's in Strife” [6] Pinky Poinker “Body for Fun” [7]Pinky Poinker “Raised Eyebrows” [8] Pinky Poinker “The Irritable Bowel and You” [9] Pinky Poinker “Popular
Linking up with Grace at With Some Grace for FYBF
