I lay in bed on Saturday morning,
Drinking my coffee, stifling my yawning,
Nothing on telly except football crap
And some blonde girl reading a weather map.
“Change the channel at once” did Pinky decree.
So Scotto changed it over to MTV.
But then Pinky could not believe her eyes
It was Hannah Montanna dressed in disguise
Her hair was cut short, she was almost nude
Her behaviour was quite decidedly lewd.
Licking a hammer, twerking her ass
If Pinky sat that way it'd bring on gas!
“What’s happened to Hannah?” Pinky shrieked in shock.
“She’s caressing that hammer like she’s caressing a …”
Could she be any cruder, what is she thinking?
I’ll bet poor Billy-Ray’s heart is sinking.
His achey-breaky heart must be all but shattered
His daughter’s ill-repute completely splattered
All over the tabloids and Twitter sphere
OMG! Is she prepping for a cervical smear ??
Is she trying to shock us by flouting the rules
And having sex with some carpenter’s tools?”
Poor little Hannah’s been lost in the fame
And now Miley acts like she’s on the game.
Such a shame to see such appalling behaviour
And with many, it seems, she’s fallen from favour
But at least we still have pure Taylor Swift
Who’s nicely presented like a well-wrapped gift
She doesn’t need feign fellatio
While Miley now has nowhere to go
You’ll never see Taylor buck naked I hope
Or swinging round nude on a piece of rope.
She relies on her talent, but one thing is totes…
I’d advise her to watch out for screaming goats.
N.B.
The objectification of girls is disgusting
With their cleavages out and their crutches thrusting.
I’m sick to death and people oughta
Start realising it could be their own sweet daughter!
With their cleavages out and their crutches thrusting.
I’m sick to death and people oughta
Start realising it could be their own sweet daughter!
Taylor Swift: Screaming goat version :)
